Your family name is an inheritance that you receive at birth.
From that moment onward, no matter where you are, your surname is always with you.
Whether it is a school attendance list, a C.V. for a job interview or a name tag at a networking event, your last name is on display.
For certain people, their last name precedes them.
“I always knew that my family was very well known – because in every bar, there was a beer with my surname on it”[i], a young adult member of the Guinness family has said.
Although it may be daunting to know that certain opinions about you could be based solely on your surname, you can be strategic about seeking out opportunities to develop and enhance your individual identity.
Eileen Rockefeller did just that and says: “I am [now] just as much “Eileen” as I am a “Rockefeller””[iii] .
Here are 3 suggestions:
1. Adopt an entrepreneurial mindset about your life
This does not mean that you should necessarily become an entrepreneur.
Rather, no matter what you want to do or how you want to live your life, have a spirit of adventure about your future and a desire to be true to yourself.
The character traits of the well known member of your family most likely included having a unique point of view and a willingness to persevere despite any naysayers and critics.
If this is the case, you are following family tradition by forging your own path.
For example, the granddaughter of a late Canadian media innovator has said: “I think I have a lot of [my grandfather]…in me. He was all about standing up for what you believe in, and believing in yourself, and always questioning why things have to be certain ways”[iv].
His positive influence on her was so impactful that, although she uses her married surname, she made the on-trend choice of continuing the legacy of her maiden name by giving it to her eldest child as a first name[v].
2. Expand your geographical horizons
The impact of your name will likely be more intense in the town, city, or country that is your home-base.
Studying, travelling or living at a distance for a period of time will give you breathing room to grow.
A life stage may create the perfect opportunity for such a getaway.
The eldest daughter of former U.S. President Barack Obama took a gap year involving travel prior to beginning her studies at Harvard University, of which her parents are alumni.
Her gap year also coincided with the last year of her father being in office, and was a way for her to begin the transition out of being a President’s daughter and into her own independence – which included supporting causes that she believes in[vi].
A peer, who is a U. S actress and activist, had nothing but praise for her saying that “it [is] amazing to…witness a human being and a woman coming into her own outside of her family and outside of the attachments that this country has on her…someone who’s willing to participate…regardless of her last name” [vii].
3. Engage in values-based activities
In order to foster your own sense of accomplishment, regularly engage in activities where you feel that you are challenging yourself and are the one who is providing value to others (e.g. mentoring, volunteering, etc.).
For some, such activities turn into a life calling.
This evolution occurred for the young adult son of a prominent family in Beijing, China.
He, his wife and a friend are co-founders of a non-profit contemporary art museum located in the art district of Beijing.
He describes his art acquisition process in the following manner: “I only [bring in] something that can touch me, teach me or enlighten me with new perspectives to look at the world and life. I enjoy the experience of discovery”[viii].
The gallery’s name consists of an initial and the English language translation of his surname[x].
Entertaining surname-related activities
The following are entertaining activities that involve embracing your family name and making it feel more “you”.
Make it a project to research the many other last names that form part of your family tree.
Develop a positive family surname motto based on a character trait highlighted in a family story (e.g. “The Roses always find a way!”).
Design a family crest.
Create a unique wine, perfume or spice blend that bears your name.
Get a personality trait handwriting analysis done of your signature.
About the author:
Elizabeth Creates is a Legacy Coach and Motivational Speaker.
She is a lawyer by background, and has worked in the wealth management industry for over 20 years helping individuals and families to align their financial life to their well-being. Her motivational speaking is focused on creating your legacy by living your best life.
She is based in Toronto and can be reached at [email protected].
[i]“Inviting Us Inside Her Tuscan Home: Amber Guinness On Love, Italy And Her Famous Family” in Hello Canada Magazine, No. 621, August 2018, at pages 9 to 11.
[ii] Juniper is a fictional surname that is used in this article for illustrative purposes.
[iii] Being a Rockefeller, Becoming Myself: A Memoir by Eileen Rockefeller, The Penguin Group, 2013, at page 2.
[iv] “Lydia McLaughlin – Editor in Chic” by Amanda Storey for Dolce Luxury Magazine on March 24, 2014.
[v] “Millennial Moms Making Their Last Name A Child’s First Name” by Alison Bowen for The Chicago Tribune on October 25, 2015.
[vi] “Malia Obama’s Gap Year: A Fad Not Just for Presidents’ Kids” by Max Kutner for Newsweek on May 2, 2016.
[vii] “Malia Obama Ditches Palm Springs For Sundance Pipeline Protest” by Jayme Deerwester for USA TODAY on January 28, 2017.
[viii]“Below The Surface: Lin Han And The Art Of Collecting” by Peggy Yuan for The South China Morning Post on May 20, 2015.
[x] “An Art-Lover’s Guide To Beijing’s 798 Art District” by Fran Lu for Culture Trip on September 27, 2017.